I’m sure you’ve heard the saying: “if a woman cries, it’s because she lost her train of thought.”
Well, here’s a new twist. If a woman cries while having sex with you, it’s probably because she lost her train of thought too.
But don’t worry – this post will solve all your problems. Instead of wiping tears away with towels or tissues, we’ll make it easy for you to win over women by not making them cry at all.
What makes a guy feel sad when his girlfriend cries?
How do guys feel when their girlfriend cries?
It’s probably a good time to mention that we are using the term “guy” here to refer to men. Women cry too and the difference between men and women is the other way around: women cry for others, but men cry for themselves. Gina, who will be joining us in a minute, has experienced this very thing herself:
This wasn’t something I’d ever done before but after I had my first baby it happened again. I cried for a long time because I felt so alone and scared. That’s one of the reasons why I started The One Thing on Facebook: to help women like me share their stories of painful experiences so they can find strength and support from others who have gone through similar situations.
I didn’t realize how many people would be going through similar things until someone posted a link in our Facebook group and said, “I just started crying after reading your post.”
I think it’s about being able to connect with other people who are also facing these problems. Seeing them can help you get through it yourself, but it’s even more helpful if you can get people who’ve gone through similar things to talk about it with you so that you can stay strong and not let your tears (or any feelings) get out of control.
It was really hard at first finding people who were willing to talk with me because I rarely cry when talking or crying is what gets me down first or takes over my whole body. But now that we have started The One Thing group on Facebook, most of our members use it as an opportunity to ask questions or connect with other members on our site or Facebook page while they are still feeling tired or emotional (or even though they’re ready to give up).
So if there are any guys out there who haven’t tried The One Thing before, check it out! It might be just what you need right now!
Trying to make her happy
Now you’re a guy, how do you feel when your girlfriend cries or swears at you?
Okay. How do you feel when your girlfriend cries?
You’d have to have one of those relationships where she cries when she gets sad, or has a bad day at work, or whatever. You’d have to be able to tell that she’s crying because she’s not happy about something. No, I’m just kidding. What if her tears are honest and sincere and true? What if they’re genuine and genuine expressions of love and sadness? How do guys feel when their girlfriends cry?
I mean, what’s the first emotion that comes to mind?
I guess I’d be feeling sad at the moment. I guess it would be like this:
It could also be like this:
But how do guys feel when their girlfriends cry or swears at them?
That’s really hard to say because they don’t really want anyone to know how they’re feeling–they want people to think they’re strong, tough guys who don’t get emotionally attached or emotionally vulnerable–and yet guys who cry in front of their girlfriends are about as common as bald men with receding hairlines on the internet. I’m guessing that there are some exceptions out there somewhere but for the most part, guys who cry from time-to-time probably aren’t worth talking about. But what about those pictures that women post on Facebook of their boyfriends crying on them when things don’t go their way–you know the ones where one person is sobbing uncontrollably while another person is pretending not to notice and just laughing it off…those are pretty rare too so I doubt any guy would ever bother posting one on Facebook. And if he did post one of these pictures then he wouldn’t even bother putting a caption underneath it–he wouldn’t let his friends see it either so they wouldn’t know how he felt either! This guy didn’t even want his friends to see him cry so he didn’t let them see him cry! That doesn’t make sense! It makes far more sense that he was holding his tears back as much as possible! It makes far less sense that he was hoping nobody would notice because basically nobody cares anyway! That makes no sense at all! Not only does this picture make no sense but this guy’s actions make even less sense too: why would he not let his friends see him cry?! Why would he keep himself anonymous
Letting her cry
This is one of the most asked questions I get, and the answer is pretty simple. The reason it’s asked so much is because it’s a great question — how do guys feel when their girlfriend cries? It’s a loaded question, like all of them are. And because it’s a loaded question, you want to be careful in answering it. There are a lot more complicated ways to answer that question than just saying “I feel sad when my girlfriend cries.”
Don’t go there. Just say “I feel sad when my girlfriend cries and I try to comfort her. There are all kinds of ways I can help her, but they don’t involve crying or hugging her; they involve listening to her talk about her problems and helping her work through them by talking with her about what’s going on with her life and also by being an active listener (something that can be hard for people who have a lot of trouble with that)
When people worry about risk, they think of how being unlucky will negatively impact their life or business (for example, when they bought a car because it was supposed to travel down the road safely). But this isn’t always true; some people don’t mind taking risks at all (e.g., the ones who took risks in their youth), whereas for others risk aversion has become an automatic reaction and takes on the whole “lucky” aspect (e.g., those who take big risks in every aspect of their lives, not just in finance). That’s why I like borrowing from Richard Dyer’s analogy here, where he talks about two types of “risk”: In the first type of “risk”, there’s no expectation of any negative outcome (like losing your job); the only concern is whether you’ll succeed or fail at doing things you’ve set out to accomplish over time. In this case, you’re very lucky if you succeed; even then there’s got nothing special or special circumstance underlying your winnings — it just happens because you’re good at what you do year after year after year… but other people may lose money investing in these stocks/products/experiences etc.; while succeeding might come down
Helping her fix her problems
A few days back, I came across this quote by John C. Maxwell (the author of the 10 Secrets of Success).
I love this quote: “Some men want to be loved for who they are, not for who they appear to be. In other words, some men want their girlfriend to cry for them because then she’ll know he’s been there for her when she needs him.”
I think it would make me feel sad personally. I don’t like to see women cry so I try to do something to make her happy or give her a shoulder to cry on. If a women cried I would let her cry to let it out so she feels better and try to help her fix her problems. But what if your girlfriend doesn’t like that?
What if you feel that your girlfriend is telling you that she doesn’t need or want your help?
What if you’re the one who needs help and your girlfriend just wants to be left alone? She may not even know it but the rules have changed. The rules changed when we started working – not around money or power, but around love and intimacy.
The rules changed when we started having sex – not around cash or power, but around love and intimacy. And the rules changed when we were together in our relationships – not around money or power, but about how much time we spend with each other…how much physical closeness we are able to share…and how much emotional intimacy we are able to share…and how much strong emotional connection we can have…and how much vulnerability we can allow ourselves . Even more importantly though, the rules changed when all of these relationships started changing – both in who was in them and what made them work . Are you prepared now that you’re also going through this? What do girls do when they cry? When they cry at home, what do guys do? When their girlfriends don’t love them anymore, what do guys do? How will you react when your girlfriend cries at home or at work? Will you call her up and apologize over and over again until she forgives you? Or will you just walk away knowing that everything is going well with no regrets because deep down inside she still loves you?
Conclusion
This is a fairly simple question but I wanted to draw your attention to it.
There are many reasons why guys feel bad when their girlfriends cry; one of the most prominent being that they feel guilty when they have done something wrong. Guys have the tendency to blame themselves for crying and feel that they should be able to console her if she is upset. This can lead to more upset and crying, which leads to more guilt, which leads to more crying… blah blah blah.
This guilt can also manifest in guys feeling embarrassed by the fact that their girlfriend is upset (the female equivalent of “I’m so sorry I am so sorry for bringing you this sad news!”). It can also manifest in guys feeling inadequate or inadequate-ish (“I’m so sorry you could not make it on time because of work, but don’t worry everything will be fine since you are such a great girlfriend and always do your best for me!”) or even worse:
guys feeling sympathetic toward their girlfriend while thinking “You know what? I shouldn’t be doing all this crying because it’s just dragging me down. If only I wasn’t such a good boyfriend!”
In either case, guys should stop blaming themselves and just let her cry on their shoulder. We were once in the same boat with our girlfriends and we know how difficult it can be for women when we are sad or upset. No matter how strong your relationship, no matter how much you love each other, there will always be situations where you will both feel like crying. So why not try to be understanding? If you want her happy, then let her cry on your shoulder when she needs comfort or happiness; just don’t expect that she will get better after every single cry (as our parents did). Instead of being sympathetic towards your girlfriends tears, try being understanding towards hers as well — putting yourself in her shoes — because now you have a chance to understand what made her upset in the first place. Try spending some time with her after crying and see if there might be something deeper going on than complaining about work (which almost everyone has experienced). If there is nothing else going on that warrants an apology afterwards, then tell yourself it’s time for a rest!
