Guys don’t always call when they like you because they’re not sure if you’re interested in them.
They tend to call more freely when they’re sure that you might reciprocate their interest.
when guys don’t call you when they like you, it usually means:
• they are not interested in the relationship.
• they like you but they’re not interested in keeping it.
• they want to keep the relationship going but they already have someone else in mind.
The reasons why guys don’t call when they like you tend to be different than the reasons why guys don’t call when they don’t know whether you’re interested in them. The main reason why guys don’t call is that guys tend to be more selective about who likes them. They tend to prefer something more substantial than a hookup hookup hookup hookup hookup hookup hookup hookup hookup hook up . . . .
So, if we want to take this guy’s problem seriously, and make him feel good about himself and his personal brand, we need to make sure that he doesn’t feel that he has some sort of social obligation (he doesn’t) or any sort of social obligation at all (he does). So, here are two suggestions for how we might help him out:
• Acknowledge that he prefers a more substantial relationship, one where there is more time and effort put into establishing rapport before asking someone out on a date. He’s not just looking for sex though. If he knows what he’s looking for (at least partially), then maybe we can find him a partner who will provide that, too.
• Let him know that what he wants from us is completely different from what people expect from us — and see if we can go further than we think is fair. We’ll be able to talk about this more in detail later on, but for now I’d say “Don’t mistake our lack of reciprocity as an unwillingness to communicate with you.” If he gets excited by this information, then maybe there’s hope for him after all!
One of the reasons why guys don’t call when they like you is when they don’t know whether you’re interested in them or not.
When things are going well, it can be tempting to call people who show interest in you. But whether they are interested in you or not is (or should be) hard to predict. The most accurate predictor of whether someone likes you is your behavior towards them: do they like what you like, do they think what you think, or does your behavior suggest that their opinion doesn’t matter?
This is no different for dating relationships: it’s not about if someone likes you; it’s about if associating with them gives you any benefit.
In other words, the question isn’t “Am I likeable?” but “Is this person interested in me?” So there’s no point in calling people who aren’t interested in you and then trying to figure out whether or not they are a good match for you. In fact, sometimes even the best-liked people don’t like what they see in the first place.
Can we learn from this? Sure! If someone doesn’t have anything nice to say about your product and service, don’t waste their time talking to them. It’s probably better for everyone involved. Instead of wasting time with people who won’t help with your business because (a) they don’t appreciate what you do and/or (b) because it’s not something that interests them enough to be worth spending some time on (they’re overreacting), take some valuable time away from the person who might actually help with your business by sending them an email saying “Hey! Nice project! Thanks for working on it!”
(In other words: this is how a normal guy would react when he felt called upon to help a stranger improve their life).
And while we’re at it… don’t mention that guy at the bar last night 😉
If a guy doesn’t call, it doesn’t necessarily mean he’s not interested.
Sometimes guys want to call you when they’re not sure that you’re interested in them. But you can help them out a bit by gently nudging them and letting them know that you are interested. This can be a subtle thing, but it can be useful if they aren’t sure whether they should call you or not.
If this is your first time on the platform, please consider taking some time to get familiar with the site and how it works before making an account. Then come back and read through some of the posts in the blog, especially those about Facebook, Twitter or LinkedIn. You may have a better idea about what to say and how to phrase it.
There are a variety of reasons why guys might not call when they like you.
There are several reasons why guys don’t call when they like you:
I think the key here is to start off with a question of how you want to be treated. If it’s just a casual chat, then asking “Will you buy me a cup of coffee?” will probably be enough to technically get him on the line. In that case, you’ll get into more detail than “Will you buy me a cup of coffee?” which isn’t really what he wants to hear. So it’s not really a question at all. It’s more like an observation, and he’ll probably want a little more from your side than that.
If it’s not just a casual chat (i.e., if he wants something more substantial), then his first instinct might be to try for longer-term commitment (i.e., once or twice in order to see if you’re interested). You can usually gauge this by asking whether he prefers the long-term or short-term commitment, and if the answer is short-term, then it might be that he doesn’t feel like hanging around for long periods of time. The second reason would be simply that guys don’t usually have sex with women who call them after only one date — they want relationships and they’re looking for someone who can give them those relationships, and sex is one way they can do it (in fact, I’ve seen guys do this thing where they will show up in nice clothes and engage in small talk before starting to engage in sex because they want her to feel as though she has something special going on with them). But actually having sex is completely different from having an “intimacy” relationship — they want intimacy with each other but not necessarily sex (“I’m dating you because I need someone who I can talk to about my life”), so maybe even talking about their lives isn’t enough (“I’d love for us to hang out and talk about our lives…”). So either way, asking him if he wants something would likely create awkwardness which is exactly what guys don’t enjoy; so instead ask him whether he knows any other girls who are interested in being with him or not (“Do any other girls know any girls who are interested in being with me?”) This should give him at least some idea of how much “intimacy” is important to him, but most importantly hopefully will lead into the next step:
The best way to gauge a guy’s interest is to pay attention to his actions rather than just his words.
This is one of the most overused pieces of advice, but still worth repeating. When you’re interested in someone and they don’t know it, you have to be more assertive. Call them again. Ask if they need a second chance. If the answer is no, then move on and try again. If they pick up the phone, they’re interested!
